Picture your favorite best friend duo from a TV show or movie. Is it Blair and Serena from Gossip Girl? Meredith and Cristina from Grey’s Anatomy? Now take a moment and think about whether you have a friendship that parallels that example you’ve spent so much time watching and being entertained by on TV. If I’m completely honest with myself, while I have good friends, none of my friendships look quite like those fictional scenarios. I have close friends, but not friends that show up at my house unannounced daily. I have friends I share things with, but I don’t cry on their shoulders pouring out my heart nearly as often as I see happening on TV. Sometimes this discourages me, and I’m going to guess that some of you girls feel that way too. But when that happens, I have to remind myself that the friendships exemplified on these shows are fictional. Just as magazine covers are edited to show what culture considers to be ideal bodies, TV shows are written to show the lives we all wish we could live. When I look at magazine covers I have to remind myself that I am not viewing a real, attainable appearance. In the same way, when I watch TV I have to remind myself that those relationships (much like many other parts of the show… who has as much money to shop with as Blair and Serena?!) are exaggerated ideals.
If you feel like your friendships don’t measure up, you’re not alone. But if that makes you feel like you aren’t good enough, you’re sadly mistaken.
Something I have learned throughout my college years is that friends are a great gift from God, but not what define me and give me value. Friends are people I share some of my happiest moments with, but not the source of my joy. Friends teach me more about who I am, but are not the ones ultimately responsible for shaping me.
Do you get that, sweet girl? Your friendships—however they may compare to the people around you and on the screen in front of you—do not add to or take away from your value in Christ. While friendship is a true gift and something we were created to experience, it is not a determining factor in your value. Your value begins and ends in the fact that you were created by God in His image and loved dearly by Him.
These aren’t my words… these are God’s! In Genesis 1:27 we read ,“God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created them.” Later in Scripture, we are reminded in Psalm 103:8 that God is “abounding in steadfast love.”
If you do feel like you’re struggling with not having close friends, let me suggest a few things that may help deepen your relationships…
Written By: Emily