In March of this year, I sat across from my roommate at almost midnight and said to her, "I just don't feel like God is good. I feel numb." Almost a week later, I received a call that my grandmother had passed away. Just two months before she was going to come watch me graduate from college. In May, I cried and lost sleep for weeks because of fear that was installed after the way someone treated me and spoke to me. In the summer, I have felt lonely, scared, and that numbness is still here.
God has not seemed good.
Time after time, I've sat in my room and told Him, "Are you really as good as I once believed you were? Because you seem really uninterested in showing me that goodness, so I'm starting to second guess you." And I feel like whenever I say this, I'm replied with silence.
You've probably been there, too. You're fearful and alone and you think God is not as good as He claims to be.
But here's the thing: God is good, even when we say He isn't.
My thoughts and fears do not dictate whether God is going to be good to me. Being good is His character. Being good is who God is. Nothing will change that.
Then why do we feel like sometimes He isn't?
Hardships. They're inevitable. And being of faith does not disqualify us from that. James 1 says, "Count it all joy when you face trials of many kinds." Notice the when. There's no if. It's when. It's going to happen. We are going to struggle.
But we are free to struggle, and our struggles don't negate God's faithfulness and goodness. I’ll say it again: No bad day will negate his goodness.
We must challenge ourselves to shift our thinking from a “pity party” in trials to a search for God's goodness in the midst of it. In the stories we read of Jesus' ministry, we read about crazy storms among the seas, and in each one of them, we read about Jesus being there. In the middle of the storm, there is a peace and a hope that goodness is there.
In her book, Uninvited, Lysa TerKeurst writes, “When sin entered the world, it broke the goodness of God’s design. And sin absolutely breaks God’s heart. But in no way did sin affect the goodness of God.” This is a reminder I need, and I hope you declare this truth over yourself today. God. Is. Good. Despite anything else.
Whether you feel like you’re wrestling with sin or drowning in a stormy trial, know this: God is a good God. If He wasn’t, He would be a liar. His goodness is a characteristic Scripture declares time and time again. He is good to you, sister. He is so stinkin’ good.
"Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever" (Psalm 107:1).
"For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving" (1 Timothy 4:4).
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" (Romans 8:28).
Written by: Carrie