Relationships…… the subject allgirls like to talk about. In the 21st century having a relationship or entering into a dating relationship can be hard. There is so much pressure to find the perfect guy for you! It starts when we are young… sometimes we want a boyfriend at the age of 5. A true committed relationship is something many girls long to have and the drama that goes with the relationship is sometimes not worth it. We asked you (our readers) what you currently see your friends or yourself struggling with when it came to dating or relationships. We got a lot of feedback!!! I hear ya girl’s dating and relationships are STRESSFUL!!!! But let’s dive into some of them!
Reader: “How long should I stay talking in my current relationship?”
What the heck is talking? Well in modern day terms it is an undefined dating relationship where two people are seeing if they want to put a label on their already formed relationship. I personally hate the phase “were talking”. I think if you are in a talking stage of your relationship that "talking phase" should only last about a month. I think that if a guy truly wants to pursue a relationship with you he will go above and beyond to make his intentions known. He won’t need a year of “talking” to figure out if he wants to date you or not. I think instead of calling it the "talking phrase" we should also be talking to God about it. We should figure out if this relationship will bring us up or down. What is the purpose of dating this individual? In conclusion, I don’t think a long “talking phase” is beneficial before you put a label on it. If you have to stay in that phase for a long time then that is definitely a red flag.
The God Excuse
Reader: Why do guys make their intentions known and then use God as a reason as a way out of the relationship?
Girls I have wondered this myself. However, God may very well have led them to break up with you, but to use God as a scapegoat is wrong. The truth is there is often times another reason they are breaking up with you. There is more to the statement. It is kind of a nicer way to end things in the eyes of the heart breaker. But as women of God we want what is best for our brothers in Christ and we have to respect their decision to end things with us. Does it hurt? Heck Yes! Is the way the broke up with us right? No, they should be truly honest with us. But the truth is we will never know whether God really told that person or not and so there really is no easy answer except TRUST GOD with the outcome of your heartbreak.
I’ve been Waiting Forever
Reader: I have been waiting on my future mate for a long time. Why is God not sending them to me?
I wish I could answer this for you. The only thing I can really say is that God’s timing is perfect. There is a reason that you are still single. Singleness is not easy. It can really stink to be single. But the Bible says “Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires” Songs of Songs 2:7. Savor this time of waiting. This time of waiting is tough and having people tell you to keep waiting isn’t helpful. I know! I have been there. But if there is one thing I can tell you is make the most out of this time. Truly make God your everything and focus on the calling God has for you. I promise it will help in your waiting season.
Reader: Where are the good guys at?
They are out there!!!!! I know you know this but do not SETTLE for just any guy. This question kind of goes back to the waiting question. It is really all about God’s timing and the people he allows to come into your life. Keep praying, keep waiting and keep looking for the nice Christian guys. They are there.
Girl’s I hope these answers helped you. There really is no easy answer for any question. The only thing I can really honestly say that will satisfy all of the desires of your heart is JESUS! I know this sounds like a “cliché” answer. However, it is the truth! God can only satisfy all the desires and all of the questions in our heart. He is the one who is in control of our lives. We have to trust him and know that he is with us in the “Dating Saga” stage some of you are in!!!
Stay tuned for more blogs in this series!!!!
Written by: Rebeccah