Everywhere we look, social media is filled with #drama.
I have a love/hate relationship with social media. I love that I can keep up with friends who live far away through Facebook. I love that I can see daily scripture on my Instagram feed. I hate that I see passive aggressive posts on Facebook statuses. I hate that I see drama unfolding on Instagram pictures.
Girls: this is a call to sisterhood.
A call to cut out the unnecessary drama.
A call to show grace.
A call to love.
A call to hold one another accountable in private, not in the public realm of the internet.
“If your sister sins, go out and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over” Matthew 18:15. (Notice how Jesus isn’t telling us to blast them publicly online?)
Seeing sisters in Christ throw punches makes me sick. It makes me even more sick when I see this happen through Facebook and Instagram. Why are we doing this? Why are we causing tension between our sisters?
Paul instructs the church in Thessalonica to “encourage one another and build on another up…” 1 Thessalonians 5:11. That goes for the modern day church as well! We are called to encourage each other. We are called to bear one another burdens in Galatians 6:2. We are not called to tear each other down!
I know what you’re thinking “but I can’t forgive her!” Hear me when I say this, yes you can. “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” Ephesians 4:32.
It is commanded in Scripture that we forgive and fellowship with other believers. This is a call to sisterhood to join together with your fellow sisters in Christ.
Written by: Brittany
I’m sure many of you have heard that Carolina beaches are experiencing more sharks than the typical summer norm. They seem to be swimming a little closer to shore than people would like. My family and I recently went on a beach trip to North Myrtle, against the warnings of many friends and family members who have deathly fears of the giant creatures in the murky waters. Needless to say, it was a HOT week. We refused to get in the water, but my Mom couldn’t stand the heat and decided to sit her chair at the edge of the water so that (at least) her feet could stay cool.
I was reading a book and looked up to see my mom jumping out of her chair and waving for a little boy to come back to the shore. At the same time, I saw his mother doing the exact same thing. Both women looked a little crazy, frantically waving with fear stricken faces. When the boy saw both of them begging him, he began to swim and then eventually sprint out of the water. I walked down to the edge of the shore to see what was wrong, when my mom told me that there was a shark, longer than her body, swimming less than 10 feet away from the little boy. As the people around them crowded around, everyone was overcome with relief, thankful that these two women had taken it upon themselves to jump out of their chairs and warn him about what was getting ready to happen. They had potentially saved him from something that would affect his life, forever.
As I was replaying this image in my mind, the Lord quietly whispered how this picture, the picture of these two women screaming after the little boy, is what the Lord calls each of us to do for our friends and family members. As I look around the world today, it’s a scary place. People that I love are slipping into habits and hang-ups that break my heart- sex outside of a God ordained marriage, over indulgence of alcohol and drinking underage, drugs, compulsive lying, addiction to social media, eating disorders, pride, and vanity. While some of these seem like “mild sin” and some seem extreme, we live in a broken world where this sin is not only possible, but it is encouraged every time we turn around. Song lyrics, television shows, movies, and even school systems promote that the “Christian way” or the “biblical way” is the “old fashioned way,” the “wrong way.” They promote that life is all about present pleasure, finding one’s “own way,” or “only living once.”
So what does the bible say about how we should approach sin when it comes to the people we love?
James 5:19-20 says, “My brothers, if anyone among you wanders from the truth and someone brings him back, let him know that whoever brings back a sinner from his wandering will save his soul from death and will cover a multitude of sins.”
Galatians 6:1 says, “Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted.”
Matthew 18:15-22 says, “If your brother sins go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother. But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that by the mouth of two or three witnesses every fact may be confirmed.”
So many times we use the excuse with our friends and family that we don’t want to judge them for their sins. However, the part that we miss, in God’s word, is that we are not called to let our friends or family get attacked by the shark. We are not called to watch them dwindle away in sin, to waste their life, or to let evil overcome. When we cannot talk to them alone or they will not listen, we are expected to call in for reinforcements, friends and family members who love the Lord and who will help us. When the little boy saw my mom waving at him, he paused and started coming to shore, but when his mother joined in, he sprinted away from something that could have harmed him indefinitely. We are called to be the friend who waves our loved ones back to shore, just as Christ called upon us!
Written by Logan
A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity - Proverbs 17:17
I have to honestly admit that finding a true Godly friend has been a little bit of a challenge in my life. Especially through cheerleading, homeschooling and surprisingly even church. However, throughout the seasons of finding them I've realized they will never be perfect and I should never expect them to be perfect. Finding a true Godly friend isn't defined as a perfect christian girl who reads his/her bible every morning and night, listens to only christian music, never lets you down or only says what you want to hear and only says positive words. It is more than that. Through high school (or even elementary), we experienced situations regarding fake friends. Some of our best friends have become even our enemies. Thankfully, God has placed a wonderful friend in my life that has such a kindred, Godly spirit and motivates me to follow God even more. She has never tempted me into doing wrong or encouraged me down the wrong path. So What does a fake friend look like and what does a real friend look like? Lets start with 10 signs of a "faux" friendship:
1. Two faced! A red flag for a faux friendship is when they constantly talk behind your back.
2. Everything is a competition.
3. They let you follow the wrong path and encourage bad decisions by letting you make mistakes.
4. They belittle you especially around other people.
5. They don't build you up or encourage you
6. Fake smiles.
7. Only friends with you when your helping them or when they need something from you.
8. They can be manipulative.
9. They can be a bad influence "Do not be deceived: “Bad company ruins good morals.” (1 Corinthians 15:33)
10. They tell you what you want to hear, not what's best for you.
God is very clear in the bible about friendships. Proverbs and Psalms gives a lot of advice.
Fake friends don't even realize they are fake. Their personality is just being unauthentic
Now that we've identified what a "faux friendship" is, lets identify 10 signs of a TRUE friendship...
1. A good influence! They don't want you to make mistakes!
2. Build you up and encourage you (even around other friends).
3. Tell you the truth even if they know if may hurt you.
4. Biblical model of friendship
5. Always there for you in the good times and in the bad.
6. They don't backstab you.
7. They are faithful to you and trust you.
8. They respect your differences.
9. They focus on what is in the inside not the outward appearance.
10. They forgive (forgive and forget).
In basic terms, a true friend loves you because they love you not for anything in return. They are accountable and encourage you with your walk with Christ. Be very careful who you surround yourself with because it is easier for a unbeliever in Christ to pull a believer down the wrong path. Do NOT be yoked with unbelievers.
"Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers." (Psalm 1:1)
"A righteous man is cautious in friendship, but the way of the wicked lead them astray." (Proverbs 12:26)
"He who walk with the wise grows wise but a companion of fools suffers harm." (Proverbs 13:20)
Finding a best friend who is an authentic believer in Christ is extremely difficult, especially in school. Even in church it becomes difficult...
I want to recap with these two stories in the bible that show prime examples of authentic companionship in the bible.
King David and Jonathan...
(1 Samuel 18-20)
King Saul, first king of Israel, had a son (aka Jonathan.) So apparently Jonathan was supposed to be the next heir of the throne, however, Saul sinned so deeply to the point that the kingdom could of been taken away from him. God's plan was for David to become the next king of Israel... Realizing he would never become king, Jonathan willingly trusted in God's plan and still decided to befriend David. Out of jealousy, Saul saw David as a threat to the kingdom, so he tried to kill him.😑 However, Jonathan helped David escape in the mist of risking his own life to protect David. When Saul was at his highest point of anger, Jonathan approached Saul concerning his friend. Sadly, not all stories are happy endings. Jonathan laid his life down for his own friend and left David heartbroken over his death.
Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. - John 15:13
Ruth and Naomi...
(Book of Ruth)
One of Naomi's sons married Ruth who was a Moabite. Even though they were associated thorough a marriage, they still remained great friends. Ruth didn't want to lose her friend regardless the fact that her husband died.
A man of many companions may come to ruin,
but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.
- Proverbs 20:11
Those two stories really stick out to me in the bible because they illustrate sacrifice and authentic loyalty to one another. Writing this blog personally reminded me that I should work on being that friend God wants me to be. Pray to God that He will give you those friends who will encourage your walk with Christ and will never lose interest in you. However keep in mind, God lets some people in and out of you life for a reason. Remember to be the friend that God wants you to be.
If your desires in a friend are contrary to the bible, then you might want to change your perspective :)
xoxo, Alexa Rose
Smiles, laughter and goofiness. Deep talks and funny inside jokes. Best friends have those. Growing up I have had a few best friends. As years go by I have seen something that has become a progressive pattern, that being that friendships change. But that happens with life and time. But what is a girl to do if their current best friend ends their friendship. I hate to say this has happened to me. I hate to think that some of you have gone through this but I know you have. Losing a best is in some cases much harder than ending a romantic dating relationship. There are different ways to handling break ups with your boyfriend, one being spend a night with the girls. But what is a girl to do if a friendship ends.
All relationships change and friends come and go. As you grow schedules changes and a two to three week absence of a friend is normal. But what happens when you choose to dramatically unfriend someone? or vice versa When that friend is the person you text every day, they know your darkest secrets it can be a hard loss for anyone.
Here’s is why it can be so hard.
1. You don’t expect it
As girls when we are friends with others we don’t expect that we will loose a close friend. We think that are bond is strong enough to withstand anything. We can often think that “ I am sorry” will truly fix some problems when we offend. So when someone is not willing to forgive you after you have made the sincerest apology it can shocking. So feeling shocked that your friendship ends is okay. Its normal. It is okay to be upset. Its what you do with the unexpected emotions that will truly show the kind of person you are.
2. You were the real you with them
So after the shock of the unexpected loss sets in. You begin to think about what really went wrong. If they are a close friend you can also become worried because you were real with them. There is nothing worse than wishing you had not opened up to a friend and thinking they will tell others your secrets. It can also hurt because you were vulnerable and shared close things to your heart. It is okay to feel that way. It is normal and your feelings are valid. But do not let this one experience of opening up to someone and the relationship ending make you closed off from future friendships.
3. They were a constant companion to you
When you are best friends someone you spend a lot of time together. It’s hard when that friendship ends because you no longer have that constant companion or person you can text about your daily highs and lows. Getting used to life without that person can be hard and can take time to get used to not having that company.
4. It’s hard to tell people why it ended
When people ask you why a romantic relationship ended it is easy to say he wasn’t right for me. He wasn’t my type. You get the drift. But being asked as to why a friendship ended can be hard and confusing. Even if your friend betrayed you or you were the one that ended the friendship. It is hard to articulate to others about why it ended.
But be encouraged!!!! You will make more friends! God has filled this amazing world with great people in it. You just have to be open to the opportunity of building new friendships. Don’t let this one experience of losing a friend make you not open to other people that could bless your life and true friends. But know that in the place of losing friend that you have a constant friend in Jesus. He is always there for you and he will never let you down or leave you.
2. Deuteronomy 31:8a “ The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; He will never leave you or forsake you.
Friends may come and go. Friends may leave you in the dust and betray you, but you serve a God who loves you so much and he will never leave you and he will be there with you. So as some of you may be hurting because of a broken friendship or another hurt in your life know that God is with you and he wants you to come to him with you hurts. So be encouraged sweet girl to go and make new friends and know that God is with you
Written by: Rebeccah